I wasn’t born into a bad family… I was born into a great family. A family who was and has always been there for me.

I wasn’t raised in the worst neighborhood in the Nation. I was raised in a bad neighborhood during my teenage years but I made the decisions, nobody else did.

I took it upon myself to make sure I was involved in every possible bad choice I could get involved in, nobody else did that to me.

I got involved with the wrong people… that was my mistake. But they were my friends. Some of them are no longer with us, some went to Prison and some became drug addicts… some still run the same life I got out of… some cleaned up and I’m proud of them (you all know who you are).

I was lucky. Out of every bad choice I made - I still breathe, talk and walk. I’m a survivor of Southern California. There’s millions of us but I feel like the luckiest man on the face of the earth every time I look back. I never even got shot… out of all the times I’ve been involved in shootings. Never got “stabbed”, although I’ve been cut. I did get beat over my head with a bat but survived through home made stitches.

I’ve been through a lot of stuff… all my mistakes.

It’s funny how some people look back and use “I” or “Me”. I did that for a long, long time. But lately I’ve come to realize that my mothers High Blood Pressure was more than likely caused by me. No, I’m not her only child but I’ve given her the most stress, that’s for sure.

My Parents got the hell out of California during the late 90’s and moved to Texas because my dad got a transfer offer from Northrop Grunman for more money than he made in Cali. He took that offer and ran… who wouldn’t? The cost of living in Cali is ridiculous. You can buy a house in Texas and pay less for the monthly mortgage than you pay in rent for an Apartment in Cali.

I never blamed them… but I missed my family!

I know my mom stressed out like crazy when she didn’t hear from me. Getting in touch with me was nearly impossible… and I rarely let her know I was OK. I look back now and couldn’t imagine how “I” would have felt. I was a problem… she knew the people I ran around with (Gang Members) and knew (through my big mouthed sisters) what kind of problems I had faced in the past.

I wonder how she felt when I called her from Jail? I’m ashamed to admit that I had done that… I didn’t call her to ask her to bail me out. I just called her to let her know.

The next time it happened - she never found out. Neither did my sisters. I realized that she didn’t need to know that type of stuff.

Now that I’m “grown up” and trying to make up for my past mistakes - I still think about one thing I told my mom when I was a little boy… I always seen how we struggled so hard in California.

I told my mom that “When I get rich - I’m going to buy you a big house!”. I was just a little kid… I never realized how hard life was. I didn’t understand that life was more difficult than watching TV, going to school and coming home to play with friends.

My thought process changed… although I’ve always been a momma’s boy. I don’t show it and most people wouldn’t believe me when I say that. But I am… big time.

Now I’m completely changing my Career, again, knowing that I have helped too many other people make too much money in this line of work. I’ve seen a lot of people become millionaires in my life. From complete dirtbag’s to “great people” who deserved it.

At this point in my life I feel like I work entirely too hard for others and never get the time to spend on my own dreams.

I remember my Grandfather telling me “one day you’re going to be a millionaire”. This was when I was 20… coming from a guy who was a self-made millionaire, that meant a lot. My grandfather struggled through some of the roughest time periods and locations of the 20th century. From his father leaving him for months when he was 8 years old to having to work through the dustbowl in Oklahoma. He became a Real Estate Investor and a Car Dealer and made a lot of money doing so. But my father never took a dime from him, although my grandfather tried giving him money.

My Father was always too proud. While all of his family was working at my Grandfather’s car lot - my dad got a job somewhere else so he could buy his own car.

He was smart… I guess. He thought it would keep him away from family drama but after my grandfather passed away a few years ago - things are back firing on those plans. A few family members are complete moochers and taking my grandmother for everything she has left. My dad and uncle are trying to stop it but what can you do? My grandmother is lonely and the only time her kids visit her are to borrow money it seems. Same with several of her grandkids.

So I’ve come to realize that just because life might have been hard - it doesn’t get any easier.

Life is full of surprises and it’s pretty scary as you get older.

I do know one thing: I will not fail because I cannot fail. I told my mom I would buy her a dream house one of these days and I HAVE to do this.

It might sound corny or foolish to some… but this is just another goal I have to accomplish as soon as possible. My parents aren’t going to be around forever… neither will I.

If I were rich - I’d probably go broke trying to make everyone around me happy… but I just need to make sure I set certain goals and keep my mind focused on those goals and nothing else.

So, Failure is NOT an option. I just have to keep grinding the gears until I get to where I need to be.

I believe 2008 is going to be the best year of my life. I truly do believe this. Not because I want to… not because I have to. I just do. Everything seems to be going great for the most part and I just get that “feeling” deep down inside.

I’m single AGAIN and loving it. I feel great. I honestly feel better at this point in my life than ever. I think I messed things up over the summer with a bad decision and killed a ton of revenue but now I see that… then - I did not. I feel so much more accomplished over the past month and a half than I ever have in my life. It makes me FEEL like a million bucks, even though I don’t have it! =)

But my new journey is going strong and I feel like I’ve got a ton of Blog Entries to post and I will do so over the next few months, guaranteed.

I’m going to try to post my entire journey and keep this blog updated as much as possible so keep an eye out!